Here's an extract.
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As she came downstairs, heading for the kitchen, Sophia heard laughter in the front hall. Her younger brother and his best friend had evidently returned from the cinema.
In the kitchen, Sophia filled the
electric kettle and switched it on to boil. The guys were still in the hall,
laughing hugely. The movie must have been hilarious, Sophia thought to herself.
She selected a mug from the kitchen drawer, and then, perplexed by so much
laughter, approached the hall, still clutching the mug by its handle.
Her brother Jay, dark haired and
blue eyed, was leaning his back against one wall, almost weeping with laughter.
Supporting himself with one outstretched hand pressed against the opposite
wall, his complexion pink with mirth beneath his light brown hair, was
Jonathan, who had been Jay’s best friend for so long that Sophia regarded him
as a sort of adoptive cousin.
“Was the movie that good?” she
asked them.
“No,” Jonathan told her, catching
his breath momentarily; “I mean, it was, but that’s not what we’re laughing
about.”
Sophia looked from one to the
other. “Well, what was so funny? You look like you’re about to collapse.”
“As we were coming out of the
cinema –” Jay began.
“‘Coming out’!” Jonathan giggled.
Jay snorted with fresh laughter,
and Sophia had to wait a moment while he recovered.
“As we were exiting the cinema,” he resumed, “we saw this little girl
dropping leaves into the gutter, one by one, with this really serious, focussed
look on her face, and Jonathan leaned over and whispered in my ear, ‘Soon my
death-ray will be complete!’” – both boys giggled “– which was a line from the
movie, you see, and it was so funny …” Jay took a breath. “So we were standing
there, trying not to show that we were laughing, because we didn’t want the
little girl to be weirded out by two strangers standing there laughing at her,
you see; and there was a lady standing nearby, – about Mum’s age, maybe;
and she looked at us strangely –”
“Queerly, even!” Jonathan cackled.
Jay gasped with laughter, sliding
his back down the wall until he was sitting on the hallway floor. “Stoppit, you
idiot … I’m trying to tell her …”
Sophia raised her eyebrows, with a
slight, patient sigh, beginning to smile at the guys’ mirth even before she
knew what the joke was.
“And Jay said something about the
human race being brought to its knees by the power of the death-dealing
deciduous leaf,” Jonathan added, while Jay recovered somewhat.
“Okay,” Jay resumed, “so we’re
standing there, sort of sniggering and whispering together but trying not to
look like we’re sniggering –”
“Sniggering in each other’s ears,”
Jonathan supplied.
“Right; and this lady was looking
at us strangely, and then she leaned in closer and said –” Jay took a deep
breath to stop himself subsiding back into laughter – “‘I hope you don’t mind
my asking, but – are you two “together”?’”
Jonathan giggled anew, holding his
abdomen with one hand while the other covered his mouth to keep himself from
interrupting Jay’s story.
“And we looked at her blankly, and
then we both realised what she meant … She was asking if … she was asking if we
were in a gay relationship! And so Jonathan …”
“I put my arm around his neck,”
Jonathan said, through his laughter, “and kissed him on the cheek, and said –”
Jay roared with laughter on the
hallway floor, knowing what was coming next.
“– ‘Why? Are you jealous?’”
“– ‘Why? Are you jealous?’”
Sophia cackled gleefully.
“And the look on her face … it was
just a beautiful moment.” Jay held up his hand, and Jonathan leaned down to
high-five it.
“Totally worth being temporarily
gay for,” Jonathan agreed.
“What business was it of hers?”
Sophia asked rhetorically.
“Exactly,” Jonathan agreed. “What kind of question is that to ask a couple of total strangers?”
“Exactly,” Jonathan agreed. “What kind of question is that to ask a couple of total strangers?”
“But it did give us an awesome
story to tell.” Jay wiped his eyes with the heel of his hand, almost hiccupping
in the aftermath of his mirth.
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Purple Flowers; Or, How To Get Your Best Friend To Forgive You will soon be published on Smashwords, and from there it will be distributed to a variety of other online booksellers.
